A Guide to being a Successful Sorceress
by The Owl Mage
Summary: Are you a Sorceress? Have emerging powers you are struggling to control? Unsure on what to do after you've discovered that magic has chosen you? Discover all your answers here in this guide, written by the powerful, stunning, successful sorceress, Morgana Pendragon, Rightful Heir to the Throne of Camelot.
1. Introduction

**HI. This is my first ever fanfic, so please be nice and tell me what you think. I've dedicated this to kripkeisgod, the fantastic writer to encouraged me to post this and is co-writing the companion peice with me.**

**Disclaimer: If i owned them, i'd be rich. Instead i'm on a student's budget.**

**Warnings: Possible Spoilers for every season. I have not actually placed this after any perticular point**

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**A Guide to Being a Successful Sorceress **

**By Morgana Pendragon**

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**Introduction**

I write this book in hopes that those who read it will be enlightened in the ways of the sorceresses. Recently I have lost my dearest sister and mentor and have come to the conclusion that, without her loving guidance in that year, I would still be struggling to master my powers instead of being the feared, powerful successful high priestess of the old religion I am today.

In light of this, I write this tome in hopes that future witches will not have to suffer my trials to blossom into their full powers. I may be a seer but even I, with all my vast powers, cannot predict the events beyond my death. So my apprentice, study hard these teachings and you to can become a fully fledged witch.

Morgana


	2. Chapter 1: The Smirk

**Chapter 1: The Smirk**

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The most important aspect of being a sorceress (or even a bog standard weak sorcerer) is the smirk. Whilst some might argue that this should be the magic, but it mush be noted that these wizards are quickly caught and burnt by the (false) monarchy of Camelot (those evil, tyrannically, Pendragons).

To have a successful smirk, one must practice it morning, noon, and night. The smirk is an art form. It should be your trade mark, unique to you and a sign of your superiority over the magic-less. Once you master it, you will no longer be able to notice that you are applying this art.

Many may wonder if one is contently smirking, you would be quickly ousted as having magic. However it is in my experience, both having seen this done and preformed it myself, that the average mortal is a fool and that the smirk has an innate magic that blinds your enemies to it. The only worry should have is about mentally unstable severing boys from outlying villages. Whilst at first they seem to be overcome to this magic, they quickly become immune, however as they tend to be idiots, many ignore their warnings so said farm boys tend to keep quite anyway.

So as you can see, the Smirk is an important tool to any sorceress, and one that must be mastered quickly. Make this a priority my students and take the first step on your destined path.

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**A/N; Morgana does smirk alot. She even did it before she went evil. And she'd not the only one, thats why it's the first chapter.**


	3. Chapter 2: The Dress

_A/N: Awwww people like me :D. Already got people favouriting and alerting this. _

_I want to thank _**_Fenix Gryffindor _**_for reviewing. I hope this is quick enough :D_

_Also want to thank my little sister, for reading through this and giving me fashion advice as I do not have any at all. _

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**The Dress**

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Now ladies, although fashions may change, the rag style is a classic that has been passed from one witch to another for many generations. Always choose clothing that is in the colours of red or black, and do not be afraid to allow artful rips to appear. This allows for multiple uses, it adds character, distracts the knights as they show off your gorgeous figure (males are so easy) and you do not have to worry about potion accidents ruining your clothing.

The only acceptation to this is when you are under cover, especially when you are trying to commit murder on certain hypocritical, tyrannical kings. The rag look is good for intimidation but if you want to fool said royal you must fully dress the part, whether that part be a beloved ward, knight, seductress or lowly servant. No one looks twice at a well dressed person so one can comfortably sneak around and plot to your hearts content.

So loyal apprentices, consider this look to be the uniform and mark of a true sorceress. Individuality is good for hedge witches, but for true respect you must dress the part.

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_A/n: This is an obvious dig at Nimueh, but could apply to many other sorcerers in _**_Merlin_**


	4. Chapter 3: Guarding Magical Items

_A/N: I'm glad people are responding postivly to this. _

_Thank you to _**_Boom-De-Ada-Boom-De-Ada _**_and _**_FallenPrayers _**_for reviewing. It's really helping my confidence. And _**_Fenix Gryffindor/Amy _**_i too had to use a translator, as the only word i understood was pronto. Languages were never my strong point :D_

**Warning:**** Spoilers for S03 Ep13 and S04 Ep 06**

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**Guarding Important Magical Items**

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When your plan, which you have been planning for a long time, goes off with out a hitch, make sure you display the most important magical component in a lightly guarded room. Knights are stupid and proud, so will most likely decide to confront you head on. Another advantage of low security is that no one will expect you're most critical piece to have only a handful of guards. The idea is so fool proof that not even the most idiotic, mentally deficient, lucky ex-farming, servant boys could mess it up. It is basically fool proof.

Here are some examples.

When using a powerful magic chalice to create an immortal army, display it proudly in the throne room. Not only is this a sign of your power and control, the room is already naturally guarded so no one can break in, empty the cup and in one fell swoop destroy your whole army. It's even better seeing as the guards are highly trained and immortal.

Alternatively, when using the head of an ancient dark creature that regenerates when beheaded to control the utterly loyal manservant and friend of a royal and order him to assassinate said royal, just place the creature into a jar and put it on a shelf of the hovel you are using as a hideout. Security is unneeded. No one, not even your most feared enemy, will ever suspect that you, with all your power and nobility, have the humility to take up residence in a run down shack. This way, no one will come to destroy the creature and free the servant.

As you can see, there is no harm is showing off important magical items and guarding them with little security is ok and a stable in being a good sorceress.

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_A/N: It was really hard not to have a go at Camelot's general security. I wonder if it's a Pendragon thing to have really bad guards._


	5. Chapter 4: Fire

_A/N:__ People are laughing, so I'm assuming that the aim of this so for successful. _

_So here is the next chapter. I think I'm enjoying this a bit too much. This took ages to write, kept getting distracted with the urge to set things on fire. Not only is that worrying on its own, it's also very warm and close today and i doubt starting multiple fires would. _

_And I'm not the only one, seems that _**_Katerina Riley _**_(THANKS FOR REVIEWING) is also being affected by the Smirk. LOL_

_Also Thanks to _**_LadyDunia _**_and _**_Kripkeisgod _**_for reviewing._

**Warning: Spoilers for S01 EP06, S01 EP13, S04 EP05 and S04 EP06**

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**Fire**

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Now in the arsenal of a good sorceress is fire. Fire reflects the soul of a witch, powerful, blazing with the strength to reduce your foes to ash. When casting spells, always use this incandescent element to improve the power and impressiveness of the enchantment. There are very few spells that cannot be improved with fire, and these are mainly curses to throw guards/knights/servants/people that get on your nerves into trees/walls.

Here are examples of how this magnificent, beautiful, burning, dancing element can improve your spells and enchantments.

When enchanting a sword to hold a thousand years so to cheat in a duel with a freshly crowned usurper to your throne, encircle yourself in flames. Not only does this help focus your spell, it looks really impressive.

When summoning a creature to control a servant (as mentioned in chapter 3), create a portal using a brazier. This creates an intimating effect that will cause the victim to tremble in fear before to implant one of the heads into his neck.

When trapping an enemy who has discovered your plan to kill a magic-raciest ruler, back him against a wall then encircle him in ankle high flames. They will be so terrified and awe-inspired that they will be frozen to the spot. There is no way they can just step over the flames and run for help or attack you.

When trying a kill an upstart, who won't join you in your plan, shoot him with a fire ball. Fire is so destructive there is no way he will survive it, stand up and blow you up with lighting.

As you can see, along with the smirk, fire should be mastered. Once you have done this, you are on the way to being the best sorceress you can be.

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_A/n:_ _Another trait that Morgana (and other villains share). Merlin has it a bit but his is more recreational purposes_


	6. Chapter 5: Belief

_A/N: The next chapter of the guide. Can you believe that I'm already half way through my list of ideas? _

_Glad my reviewers agreed with me over the fire and Gaius bit. However I disagree with the breaking a bone bit. In the first ever episode (_**_SPOILER ALERT_**_) he did fall of a balcony. Merlin may have broken his fall and slowed him down but at his age I'm sure still sure there should have been some kind of injury._

_I was so tempted to add the bit in S01EP09 where Merlin tried to kill the Wraith, sure they were higher the Edwin's (for about 10 seconds) but the flames were at least 5 meters away from it at each point. And they wonder why it failed. I couldn't add that as I enjoy having Morgana indirectly insult Merlin and it wouldn't work if she knew he had magic to._

_Any way, this chapter was hard to write. I didn't want to abandon it and try a different idea so this was produced. Enjoy :D._

**Warning: Spoilers for S01EP12 and S02EP12**

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**Belief**

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Before you fully plan an attack, you must remember the reason behind it. Your convictions are what make the attack successful.

This piece of advice is one of the most difficult to follow, as many people, foes and allies alike, will try to dissuade you from your path. But you must stand strong.

So what if it was that was the only way to save Camelot, your friend still shouldn't have even thought about poisoning you, let alone actually doing it. It doesn't matter that you also tried to save innocent people from death and living in fear by arranging for a band of rouges to assassinate your tyrannical royal guardian who gives the order. All in the name of your maid/friends falsely accused deceased father. The two situations are completely different and only you were right in your actions and your ex-friend needs to pay.

Even I have to deal with naysayers. It does not matter that my brother, the traitor, is male, the crowned successor, and a legitimate heir, I am the eldest so the throne is rightfully mine. I have even conquered Camelot so my claim is even stronger.

As you can see, your strength in your beliefs should be unconquerable. A flimsy belief means a flimsy plan and you'll never get what you want.

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_ A/N: yes Morgana. Although I'm certain they are actually called delusions. _


	7. Chapter 6: The Plan

_A/N: HI, well this up later then normal. I've been out most of the day and then had a movie marathon._

_However this has been nagging me since I got home so I had to write it. I was alternating between Thor and this fic. And here it is for your enjoyment. :D _

_Unfortunately I'm going to be busy soon so don't expect updates everyday. If I can update I will though._

_This chapter was fun. I don't know why but it was._

_I want to thank _**_Mai Ascot _**_for reviewing and for the idea. However I plan for this to run until the show is no more. I'm sure the Villains or Merlin will give me plenty of material to use in Series 5 (and any other series I hope/beg they will make. And that seems a tad to out of character for Morgana but it has given me an idea for a possible ending. :D_

**Warnings; Slight Spoilers for S02EP12,S02EP05, S02EP06, S03EP01, S03EP02, S03EP12, S03EP13, S04EP12, S04EP13.**

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**The Plan.**

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Planning is highly important. You cannot just march into a castle and hope for the best.

When choosing a plan of attack, always ensure that you deviate as little as possible from previous plans. There is nothing wrong with the classics, and if it fails the first time, your enemies will not expect you to execute the same plan again and again.

I personally prefer to invade using a large army, the solders/knights being immortal preferable. Only small details need to change, such as how the solders/knight gains immortality. May it be through an ancient curse, through a powerful magical artefact or by animating skeletons to attack? Your foes will look for the solution for the previous cause of the immortality so you can conquer to your hearts content.

Love Spells are also a classic. Causing a royal to fall in love is not only a good way to cause a distraction, it also cause some interesting side affects. A certain troll queen of Camelot comes to mind.

Whilst planning your big attack, don't be afraid to mix it up with a few smaller plans, such as bringing back deceased love of soon-to-be queens, or tearing the veil between worlds. These will distract your enemies and allow you to plot and prepare for your big scheme in peace.

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_A/N: Really the last two_ _season finales were very similar (no immortality) and the idea been used before in the show as well. Along with Love Spells, this seems to be a favourite plot device of the writers._


	8. Chapter 7: Monologue

_A/n: Hello readers, I know I didn't update yesterday, I was ill so had a movie marathon day. I've still got a headache but managed to write this. However seeing as I have an interview/audition to prepare for it is properly better that I start letting people down with the updates now._

_This chapter was fun to write, seeing as it is a cliché of every villain in any fandom._

_Thank you_ **_Cypriana _**_for reviewing and I'm sorry for not thanking you earlier, I'm still figuring out the site and found out how to moderate guest reviews. I shall now check that more regularly. _

**Warnings: Slight spoilers for S04EP13, S04EP06**

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**Monologue**

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When your enemies trembling at your feet, take time to thoroughly outline your plan and what you plan to do to them. Gloating makes your victory sweeter and there is nothing like seeing the realisation dawn across the face of the defeated. Your foes will never think to escape whilst you are performing your monologue as they will be in awe of your brilliance and be petrified with dread at the description at what you will do with them.

Do not be afraid to drag out your monologue over many hours or days. If you need a break, just have your highly trained, observant, inescapable guards throw your defeated foes into the dungeons or have the most attractive, roguish one with great hair take of his top and fight for his supper. No one will dare break in and release your prisoners, then come to try and take you out.

Monologues are not only for victories, they can also be used at the beginning of a plot. Explaining your plan to an unwilling pawn, from everything to the history of the important magical artefact/creature to what you plan on having your pawn do. This is guarantied not to come back and bite you. It's not like your pawn will get free and come after you.

As you can see apprentices, the monologue is important and a classic trait of a sorceress. Don't be afraid to add your own flair, such as the stroking a fluffy white domestic animal, such as a cat.

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_A/N: Sorry I couldn't resist the slight James Bond crossover. I know that it isn't historically accurate, but nothing in the show is, so i pretend Merlin is set on another world instead of just in the past_


	9. Chapter 8: Evidence

_A/N; So here it is, the next chapter. I've noticed as I right this, I love to insult Merlin, which is weird as he is one of my favourite characters. Meh, its still good fun._

_I keep getting distracted by other fic ideas though, mainly the companion to this, _**_A Guide to Combating Magic,_**_ co-written by _**_Kripkeisgod_**_ (and I agree with your odd guest comment GWAINE). That should be up either today or tomorrow. _

**Warnings: Nothing specific.**

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**Evidence**

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When pulling off a plot, if you have to resort to removing the odd intelligent or lucky guard, make sure you leave as much evidence as possible. Leaving a body out in plain view with obvious wounds has two obvious advantages.

First advantage is that it causes a distraction. Everyone from the royals to that idiotic apprentice physician will be so curious about how and why the victim was attacked and how he died to worry about what you are up to. Sure the brainless guards and knights will be on the lookout for a killer but that's no matter. They will never catch you.

The second advantage is that it scares people and reminds them of your power, even if they are unaware that you are the killer. The second greatest power, after magic, is fear. Nothing, not love, loyalty, nothing tastes greater than fear when it rolls of your enemies.

Don't just leave it to bodies. Leaving out poultices, obvious magic boxes of ash, magical bracelets will rarely be found and if they are, no-one will connect them to you. And like the bodies, they are guarantied to frighten the masses.

So make sure that you leave evidence all over the place. Don't worry about being caught; there is more chance of the Prince of Camelot's servant having magic then a guard or royal catching you in the act.

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_A/N: No comment, Morgana. _


	10. Chapter 9: Sneaking Around

_A/N: HI guys and girls. I hope you're not angry at me but my other fics started to scream at me and I'm weak, so very, very weak. :D_

_I'm glad that you like the previous chapter, and that people are getting enjoyment out of my one liner. That final sentence was a last minute thing I honestly didn't realise I was writing. _

_Well I hope you enjoy this latest offering. __I'm sorry that it's not as long as some of the others._

**Warnings: Nothing specific.**

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**Sneaking around**

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When sneaking around the shadowed halls of a castle, there are two important rules you must follow.

The first rule of sneaking is the choice of cloak. Stay away from black cloaks that would allow you to blend into the shadows, instead choose a dark blue or even a bright blood red. I personally suggest the red, as there is a small, minuscule, a one in a billion chance that you will encounter a guard with diminutive intelligent. When this guard tries to stop you, an innocent sorceress out after hours to plot of a scheme, you will have to kill him, preferably with a dagger. Whilst it is regrettable that you must further lower the average intelligence of the kingdom that is your enemy, it is unfortunately necessary. However, a red cloak hides the blood stains, so you won't immediately alarm others who spot you, and you still look fashionable.

The second rule may sound illogical but that is far from the truth. When sneaking around, do not stick to the shadowy areas and hidden alcoves. Instead walk boldly down the middle of the corridor, only stopping at corners to see if anyone is around it. Walking down the centre gives you a sense of purpose that helps weave the illusion that you are doing nothing wrong. This is especially useful when in fact you are sneaking out to confer with your co-conspirer. This advice is also true if you need to acquire a horse. Just act like there is nothing wrong with riding out in the middle of the night; the guards at the gate will not stop you or even report your actions.

So just follow these simple rules and you will be successfully sneaking out of enemy fortresses like any great sorceress.

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_ A/N; __This is a classic for Merlin villains. At least Merlin and the Knights hide before pushing someone out as a distraction. _


	11. Chapter 10: The Lair

_A/N: Hello patient people. I honestly have no excuse for your wait but if I do offer one would you expect going to see The Dark Knight Rises, watching (and trying to explain to a well meaning but confused friend) Olympic artistic gymnastics (GO ON BETH! Yes I'm British), job hunting and a cold being distractions?_

_Once again, thank you to my reviewers, and people who have favourite/alerted this fic, you keep me going on long days. I was watching re-runs of Merlin (and just over a month to SEASON 5!) and picking up inspiration when this idea hit. Whilst I still have a few ideas left from my original list, this wouldn't leave me alone so enjoy. :D_

**Warnings: ****Nothing specific.**

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**The Lair**

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Whilst planning, gloating and fabulous dress sense is important, all of this becomes useless if you don't have a safe haven to plan from, practice your gloating in or hang your fashionable ripped dresses and red cloaks in.

When choosing a lair, consider both location and style. Whilst large fancy castles and fortresses in the middle of a large kingdom are nothing less then you deserve, until you have funny and successfully executed a plan, it is best if you hide...erm... stay in a cave or hut in the middle of nowhere.

The location of your hut/cave is essentially important. When you choose to tactically leave in a whirlwind (which any good sorceress can do), witch hunters and members of royalties seem to believe that you only have the power to either transport to another part of the town or a village over if you're incredibly powerful. Whilst this gives you the advantage to make a clean get away whilst the idiots are harassing peasants, to keep this advantage you must remain far away from civilization. This way no patrols will inadvertently stumble across you like some idiotic manservant of a king and you can happily murder old sorcerers of dubious sanity who are meant to be your doom without the irritation of screaming villages or pesky knights.

Just because you are forced to live in a rundown hovel doesn't mean that you can't decorate. Hanging dried herbs with no apparent uses from the roof gives the place a homely feel whilst filling the room with lovely aromas. To give your lair a mysterious, magical air, use shelves of odd magical knick-knacks that will become important in your spells and a large brazier to increase the potency of your spells using glorious fire. Finally, add a string of dead rabbits to a random corner of your hideout. Whilst you know that you will eventually cook them up for a stew, any trespassers will believe that they are really incredibly vicious rabbits that only a powerful sorceress could kill. Said trespasser will proceed to whimper in terror at the realisation that he is in a witch's home and you can saviour his fear before putting the fool out of his misery. These simple tips make a depressing hole into a lair that screams powerful future ruler.


	12. Chapter 11: Lurking

_A/N:__ Hello Merlin Fans. First off I would like to apologize for the delay. Life and writers block got in the way. _

_I'm not entirely happy with this chap as it doesn't seem to flow as well. Its also short. However when I tried a different idea, Lurking kept showing up so i ran with it._

_I'm back at university soon (start again on my Birthday so booo!) so updates for all my fics will be slow. _

_Thank you to my reviewers, alerters, favouriters and readers for being supportive._

_Now on to the chapter._

**Disclaimer:****I asked if I could have it for my birthday. Apparently due to kidnapping laws thats not possible.**

**spoilers:****SE1EP13 SE4EP2 mainly**

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**Lurking**

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Lurking is one of a sorceress's most important tools. It is one that she must learn if her plan involves under cover work or must teach to her pathetic underlings so that information can be easily gathered.

This technique requires years of practice to prefect. It is difficult to refine this art so that it seems that you are merely waiting for someone instead of spying on your enemies if you are caught. The key to mastering this is simple. Practice. No matter the time or place, always practice your lurking.

When I was still living in Camelot I would unknowingly train myself in this skill. For example, when upset with my hypocritical, evil guardian or his pig of a son I would stare out of the window and subconsciously gathering information on the comings and goings of the brainwashed citizens. When my mind was opened to my potential, I used that same stance to spy on my moronic excuse of a brother and watch has he comes and goes from the city ... possibly with an enchanted armlet designed to sap the life force from him.

You know you have completely mastered this skill when you can lurk in shadowy alcoves and no one questions why you are there even after you spring out on your victim to give them a warning/threat. Although this may just be that the certain serving boy who was the recipient of both my warning and threat has the intelligence on a burnt spoon, other servants and nobility of Camelot was blind to my presence so that must be proof of my skills.

So apprentices in the art of magic and enchantments, heed this advice. Lurking is a tool not only for yourself to master but also your minions. Insist that they learn this skill before going on missions to gathering information. Remember a bad lurker is a caught lurker.


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